Today is one of those days. Every little thing has me irritated and on edge. From noises like dogs barking or little humming sounds coming from the fridge, or the feeling of your hair being in your face. Simple tasks like making a meal or turning on a light switch have me on edge. Every. Little. Thing. If you’re in a similar situation right now, you probably relate to the feeling. You’re probably even thinking: Get to the point already! So today I’m going to practice these tips, and hopefully you decide to apply them to your life as well.
FIGURE OUT YOUR FRUSTRATION
Find out what exactly is bothering you. Dig deep as to why you’re feeling the way you are. Once you acknowledge the true source, accept it. Don’t keep telling yourself that it’s not even a big deal. It’s a problem that you’re having and trying to shut it out will only make it worse. For example, earlier, I was getting mad that the neighbors’ dogs were barking uncontrollably. The wrong approach was to tell myself that I was overreacting and I shouldn’t get mad over something so small and insignificant, leading me to having a higher conflict. Not only was I frustrated with the dogs and the neighbors, but also myself for not understanding my personal needs and true feelings. Thankfully, I was guided to approaching this conflict correctly after. Here’s what I did to solve my frustration. As the barking continued, I asked myself “Is this a familiar feeling?” “Have I felt this way before?” It took some digging in my brain, but I acknowledged the actual feeling I had. Helpless. This made me realize that it wasn’t exactly the dogs or neighbors that were making me mad. It was the feeling of being a teenager again, at an environment where I felt helpless. It was a lot of past feelings being brought back without me even being aware until I did some brain digging. Finding out the true source is such a relieving feeling. There’s one thing you actually do have control over in these situations: How you treat yourself. You’re not casting away your feelings or making them feel irrelevant. Once you address the actual problem, this will help you feel better already- but we want you to completely get that stress out of your system. So let’s move on to the next thing we should do when need to calm down.
VENT IT OUT
If there’s a friend that makes you feel comfortable and feels comfortable enough to listen, let out your frustration! Make sure they know the frustration is not directed to them. Also make sure that they are in the right mentality to listen as well. I always ask my friends beforehand, “Would you mind if I vented something out?” They’ll be kind enough to immediately reply “Yes! Of course!” Sometimes they’re having a bad day themselves. Just be courteous beforehand. If you don’t feel like going to any person in particular, write it on paper! That’s honestly my go-to. The feelings you feel now are most likely not going to stay for long. Writing on paper is especially effective when you get every single detail down, then shred those words up later on. You’re addressing your frustration and putting value onto your words, then shredding the frustration. It’s kind of symbolic if you’re into that.
I personally hate when people tell me to relax. Help me relax then! ..No but seriously – Do something to relax your body. My favorite thing to do is take a nice warm shower, scrub my body with my favorite body scrub, put some cozy socks on, and then nap afterwards. Or if you need to *literally* cool down, take a cold shower then snuggle up with some nice warm blankets. It’s not good to completely dismiss your problems, but if literally everything is frustrating you, take a nap to dismiss those little things that are bugging you . After, you can wake up and tackle those big problems when you’re calm. I actually took a nap before typing this post down, and it drastically changed my mood. Sometimes you’re just tired! Who knows? Try it out.
If you’re in a situation where you’re working on a project or can’t nap or get away for a while, at least give yourself about ten minutes to breathe. Drink a huge glass of cold water. Take really deep and strong breaths. Eat a snack! Splash water on your face! Anything you can do for a little bit to calm your brain, do it. If you’re at work, its better to be honest and say that you need to cool down rather than holding it in until you explode later on. It’s important that you view yourself as a main priority in all scenarios. If you need a break, take it. Putting more value on your feelings will drastically improve your outlook on everything.
I have two episodes on my podcast show that are super beneficial to listen to when you’re in a situation where you’re stressed out. I highly recommend that you listen! I’ve attached them below.
SELF DEVELOPMENT WITH VIRONA: HOW DO YOU TREAT YOURSELF? “Gain independence and confidence by knowing that you have the person you need the most- yourself. Why is important to treat yourself well?”
SELF DEVELOPMENT WITH VIRONA: IT’S OKAY TO TAKE SOME TIME OFF “You may feel like you aren’t allowed to give yourself a break. Your body needs to recharge!”
Be Calm: Proven Techniques to Stop Anxiety Now
The Book of Calm: 250 Ways to a Calmer You
Cultivating Calm: An Anxiety Journal
Calm the Chaos Journal: A Daily Practice for a More Peaceful Life